Chickens in the Basement

I love to write and I love to laugh. When I write, I get to the point quick. My stories would fit on the back of a postcard. They usually make me chuckle. And you know what they say, "It's all about me!"

Monday, April 5, 2010

16 Years Ago Tonight...



Tomorrow, my oldest baby will be 16. He was quite comfortable in the womb and had to be forced out! I knew I was in labor because my body made a sound like a huge water balloon bursting. I made it from the bed to the potty in about 3 steps before the tidal wave hit.




We had done all of the Lamaze classes and I knew I didn't want to have natural labor. I am not into pain when there is an easier way to do it. Just in case, I learned how to sign the word epidural in case I was struck dumb by labor!




Once in the hospital, I wasn't dilated, so they gave me Petosin. That brought on the contractions...STRONG! Where's my damn epidural? I did not want to hear that I had to dilate a few more centimeters before that happened.




A few more hours, lots of whining and moaning on my part, and the man with the big needle finally came in the room! Through all of the pain, I swung my legs over the side of the bed, bent over and suggested he hurry the hell up!




The epidural helped with the pain, but it did not produce a baby. I pushed and pushed and pushed, cried a little bit, and pushed and pushed. No baby. Since the doctor could see the head up in the tunnel, he decided to pull out his special Electrolux and suck that baby out of me. No baby. By this time, we'd been up all night.




But, the doctor wasn't out of tricks. He pulled out some forceps. This finally worked! My Will was born weighing in at 9 pounds 12 ounces with a cone head from the vacuum and a forceps mark in the center of his forehead!




I thought I would just be exhausted and ready to sleep. But one look at that boy and I was in love for life...cone head and all!




Happy 16th Birthday Will!


19 comments:

Jenny S said...

awww, suction and all I am tearing up! So sweet!

Midcenturymadam said...

Happy birthday Will. Way to make your mom work to see you. Okay I know he doesn't want to hear Sweet 16 but he sure is a cutie.

Barbara said...

Some babies just don't want to come out! How you guys managed to get through that is beyond me (sitting here childless)!!

Happy birthday to YOU as well as your son!

Mick said...

Happy Birthday! Your Sons birht sounds a lot like that of "Tristram Shandy"!

Linda said...

Anna I am laughing and crying at the same time. That sounds like my first labor and delivery! Baby #1 was not as large as yours but had a big head and was pulled out with forceps! Sigh....I too fell in love with just one look. Happy Birthday to your First Born! 16!!! wow!

Ninny said...

Love your birth story! You can use it to guilt him into stuff later. My oldest is 36, youngest 29. Both popped out fast, easy as...well, I was gonna say pie, but as I hate to cook pie won't work. But you get the idea. Your birthday boy is a cutie, bet he eats a lot. Sixteen year olds have bottomless stomachs.

I know your sun rises and sets in him...

Liz

Dr. Monkey Von Monkerstein said...

He's a smart one. I'd have stayed inside you too if I was your kid. ;o)

Anne - Fiona and Twig said...

Awww, Happy Birthday to your bouncing baby conehead! He looks like a great kiddo. :-)

Have a wonderful week!
Anne

1950's_atomic_ranch_house said...

Yikes! This is why I never had kids. This kind of story scares the heck out of me!

Brave woman, I couldn't do it lol...

Happy Birfday kiddo. =D

Mimi said...

Wow! What a great story! He's a doll!

Chicken Boys said...

Happy Birthday Will! When my niece was born, my sister called at 4:30 a.m. and said her water had just broke. My niece was born at 6:17 a.m. She was a week late, though. My sis was due to be induced at 7 a.m. that morning.
~Randy

Vintage Christine said...

Since I spent most of yesterday on the phone and computer with credit unions and banks I didn't get a chance to read this until now--so HAPPY BIRTHDAY SON OF MIZ CHICKEN!! He's in excellent company--my dear father George was born 84 years ago today and sister Lowly Trooper Sally was born exactly 26 years later. Dad will be spending the day in dialysis but he's so glad to still be alive and kickin' that he doesn't mind it a bit. And hey! I'm next!!!!!

LemonyRenee' said...

Aww, my story is almost exactly like yours, but without the vacuum and forceps, and with a c-section. Conehead, too. The nurse told me not to take his hat off for three days and he would be fine. So I didn't, and he was.

dobco said...

Oh the memories! Been there, done that, glad I am on this side of it! One day I will share my birthing story of my second with you! Oh the joys of motherhood.

Jill said...

You brought tears to my eyes even with all the graphic detail! My son Will, will turn 16 in August. Tell him Happy Birthday from Nebraska--I'm sure he'll roll his eyes--any good 16 y/o will.

Beth said...

Happy Birthday Will- I hope you appreciate all that your mother went through for you that fateful day. I say you fix her a cocktail and spend the day on your hands and knees thanking her.

Missy AKA Little Messy Missy said...

My 16 year old daughter just said your son is a BEAST! I think that is a good thing!!!

Mary said...

Memories of those 'birth days' are always full of highs and lows - and men only get to sample it all if they're lucky (huh!!!!) enough to get a kidney stone!!!

Belated Happy 16th B'day Will, kiss your mommy for what she went through.

Julie (Legacy Crafter) said...

Happy birthday Will, you have one nutty mom but she is sweet as all get out!